Welcome to Mommies with Hope

Come and find solace as you get to know us who share in this journey of grief. We have been praying for you and extend our deepest and sincere sympathy. We “hope” you experience comfort and peace in this safe haven of love and support.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

In the Word Wednesday...Is This a Punishment? (Ch. 4)

Please forgive the delay on this post! My laptop has seemed to crash :( and my computer time has been limited as a result. So, please send prayers my way for this laptop situation. This may be a little deep, but I truly believe this little hang up is a part of a larger spiritual battle going on...the Enemy would want nothing more than to keep these Jesus-lovin', gospel-proclaimin' fingertips from typing up some Truth for all you ladies!

NOTE: Giveaway winners will be announced later today....promise!


Why is God punishing me? I know I have sin in my life. Is that the reason He took my baby? I've had multiple miscarriages or losses...there must be something I'm doing wrong! I don't have any living children...maybe I'm not fit to be a mom to children on earth?

Some of you may read the above questions or statements and wonder how someone could think such a thing. Others of you may read them and feel a sense of relief in knowing that you weren't the only one who's had such thoughts. In fact, that's the way I felt when reading Chapter 4 of Becky's book, And Then You Were Gone. While it pained me to know she too wrestled with such thoughts, I was comforted to know that I wasn't alone. Perhaps you can relate?

Becky shared some great points from Scripture that I want to highlight and challenge each of us to reflect upon and think about...

One of the passages of Scripture that she shared in Chapter 4 has brought me incredible comfort in my own loss experiences; John 9:1-3. This is the story of Jesus healing a blind man. Before Jesus performs His healing work, the disciples question the situation. They ask about who sinned that caused the man to be born blind...was it him or his parents? Jesus so lovingly responds by saying, neither this man nor his parents sinned, but this happened so that the work of God may be displayed in His life. Did you get that? So that the work of God would be displayed in his life! Wow. I cannot tell you what a relief it is to see this specific example in Scripture. I could go on with some of the ways in which I have seen God at work in and through my own loss experiences, but today, I'd rather hear from you...

Think about how this story relates to your own experience of loss. What is your reaction to this story? Have you seen God's work displayed in your life? Have you allowed God to work in and through your loss experience?


There's so much more to say about this chapter, and I intend to via video, so stay tuned. For now, reflect upon the questions posed above and please share your thoughts in the comments.


Becky Avella said...

Teske, Every Wednesday morning I wake up excited to see what you've written next. Your posts are a gift to me. And so are the other comments left by your readers. : )

I'm so thankful for the way our story is being used to "display God's work." Every time I get to hear that someone read the book and it was helpful, my heart fills up with so much gratitude to Him for bringing beauty and purpose from the hurt. God has been so good to our family.

Wondering if I was being punished was a very real and difficult struggle for me. I had a lot of fear and irrational, even superstitious thoughts at times. Even if I understood truth on a logical level, the grief made me believe illogical things at the heart level. Learning that He really loves me and that my losses were not punishment was one of the most important lessons I needed to learn on my journey to healing. And most importantly, I had to learn to replace false beliefs with truth. That wasn't easy either.

I've been surprised by how many women have said they struggled with the same thing. I've also been so blessed to hear many stories about beautiful things God has done in the lives of other women and their families through their losses.

He sure is doing beautiful things through you, Teske! Thank you for your faithfulness. : )

Jamie said...

Per Doug Phillips: As he drew his message to a close, he posed this piercing question to mothers: “What if miscarriage was God’s means of showing mercy and love on a human soul, and if He chose you to be the honored vehicle to usher that child into eternity?

I LOVE that!!!

I can't really think of specific examples per se, but I know God has worked through all of my losses in our lives and the lives of others. I have even been able to minister to a few friends who had losses after I did and I know God used that. I only pray He will continue to use them for HIS glory, for what other purpose could such pain possibly serve?

java diva said...

Wow, I cannot wait to read this book! The story of the blind man had given me so.much.hope during the pregnancy.
But lately I have been reading about David and Bathsheba's son God took from them. And that was due to David's sin.
So I'm a little confused. Because of what happened to David, I do want to think the "why" in my daughter's death was my sin. I do struggle to see how God displayed His work in lulu's life because she was not healed. The only thing I have to hold onto is that she became a tissue donor. That is a great gift of comfort.